In the Quiet
by SkyChasingDreamer
Summary: The Joui war wasn't just battles and mayhem, there were quiet times in there as well. Moments Takasugi began to crave just as much, if not more, than fighting. Adolescent!Joui fic.


Takasugi sighs.

Gintoki isn't paying attention, so Takasugi sighs again, louder this time. It's gratifying that Gintoki actually stops what he's doing and glances up, but the best part is that he's able to figure out what Takasugi wants with just that glance. They've been stuck in a crowded room for far too long and Takasugi's patience has run itself pretty dry. He's tired, everyone in the room is, but Takasugi gets something no one else is allowed to have.

With utmost subtlety, Takasugi slips away and no one notices. People don't pay too much attention to him when there's a big group, except Katsura because there isn't much of anything that can get by him. Takasugi doesn't try as hard as he used to in that regard, it's just such a waste of effort when Katsura's likely going to figure it out anyway. It'd be different if Katsura actively did things to interfere, but he tends to keep his distance and keep his thoughts to himself.

Takasugi doesn't get far before their are hands on his hips and he's being turned and pushed into a wall, Gintoki's body quickly covering his own. They're not in a relationship, not really, what they have is something they both consider to be a good distraction to things neither of them want to deal with. At least, that's how Takasugi assumes it is on Gintoki's end, it's not like they ever talk about this stuff.

Takasugi leans his body against Gintoki's and slides his hands up his chest as they kiss. They never started out slow, it has always been fast and hard, quick and biting. Each time could be their last and Gintoki's hands take a firmer hold on Takasugi's hips as if he can feel the compression of time already weighing on them. Gintoki's chest is firm and warm through his clothes, the whole of his body harder than it was only weeks before. It seems to Takasugi that he gets more and more filled out each time they do this, a measure of growth that Takasugi isn't sure he's keeping up with. He's getting stronger too, war and fighting is like a shot and shove into maturity, but Gintoki somehow always feels different.

Except in the rare early mornings when they're tangled up together and dozing, in those times Gintoki seems nothing more than the boy he should be. His hair is all tousled and his red eyes bleary, his scarred skin softer somehow — Takasugi likes those mornings, though, Gintoki has no idea.

"Dammit," Gintoki mutters and only a second later, Takasugi hears the sound of footsteps too.

Giving Gintoki a shove to get him to step back, he grabs a fistful of his clothes and drags him to their room. They have to share a room with Sakamoto and Katsura because of where they're stationed at for the time being, but banking on Sakamoto staying on the roof for awhile and Katsura knowing to keep his distance to give them time, Takasugi guesses they have maybe an hour to themselves. An hour used to be long enough, but somewhere in there he began wanting more time, so while they can make do with an hour, it's not enough anymore. It was hard coming to terms with those changes, he hadn't wanted _those_ kinds of changes, the ones that involve feelings, but there's no stopping it now.

An hour will never be long enough again.

Takasugi opens the door to their room and Gintoki yanks him backward. The force makes him turn and the next thing he knows, he's lifted off the ground with his legs and arms around Gintoki's waist and shoulders, respectively. Gintoki kicks the door to slide shut, but by then they're already kissing, Takasugi's hands in Gintoki's hair to make sure it gets good and messed up. A part of him hates that he can be lifted so easily like this and another part of him has absolutely nothing against it. Gintoki kisses him like this will be their last, he always does, and that hint of desperation is somehow both reassuring and alarming — kind of like whatever the hell they have together. It's good thing so long as they're together, but it becomes an incredibly bad thing when they're apart.

How can Takasugi keep fighting his hardest when his mind drifts to worrying about someone else?

That's not good. Not good at all.

It's also not something he's going to think about right now because there's a tongue in his mouth and he twists permy hair in his fingers until Gintoki moans for him. He has no fear that Gintoki will drop him, he doesn't actually have a single worry on his mind at the moment. All he's thinking about right now is this time that he wants with Gintoki, right now, in these short moments, the simple things are all that matters, everything else can be blocked out.

It's here in these moments that Takasugi remembers what it used to be like to be happy.


End file.
